- "What if I had stopped exercising?"
- "If only I didn't stress myself so much at work ".
- "What if I hadn't had sex that day?"
- "If only I didn"t drink so much coffee/wine."
Helen Jaeger, in Paths through Grief offers much-needed insight. She says, " We do not live in alternative worlds where other outcomes are possible. We live here, we live now and, when we are grieving, we live in pain."
Pause and think on that a moment. Then forgive yourself, let go and live free.
yup I asked my self all those questions. I drank the night we concieved my first loss. I was also very stressed due to relationship stuff. And of course family, partner whether they realize they do it or not always blame the woman. You know it is alot to take on. I think it about acknowledging perhaps I didn't do anything wrong, but it just is.................... But that is easier said than done
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